Odd Girl Out
In her book, Odd Girl Out, Rachel Simmons shows the secret world of girl’s aggression is just as harmful as that of boys. It’s just harder to recognize. Girls are not encouraged to express their anger and so it goes underground. For girls losing a friend or becoming the object of a clique’s derision can be devastating.
Every generation has struggled with this. Naming the problem is often the first step in solving it.
In a normal conflict, two people use language, voice, (fists) to settle disputes. The relationship between them is secondary to the issue working out. When anger can not be voiced, when the skills to handle a conflict are absent, the specific matter is not addressed. If neither girl wants to be ‘not nice’ the relationship itself becomes the problem. When there are no other tools to use in a conflict, relationship itself can become a weapon. Since relationship is precisely
what good girls are expected to be in, its loss and the prospect of solitude can be the most pointed weapons in the hidden culture of girl’s aggression.
Rachel Simmons
Odd Girl Out
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