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Tend and befriend




  Tend and befriend behavior is shown by animals, including human, when under threat. It refers to protection of offspring (tending) and seeking social group for mutual defense (befriending).



  The dominant model of human responses to stress has been the fight or flight response. In response to threat humans, and other animals, can become aggressive and confront a stressor (fight) or flee, through avoidant coping, social withdrawl or substance abuse. Another tendency is to affiliate, to come together in groups in threatening times.



   This tend and befriend response refers to people managing threats by caring for offspring and seeking social support in stressful times.



  Evolutionary base suggests females prefer the tend and befriend response than men. In history, work was sex segregated, women more responsible for child care. Selection pressures for response to threat that benefits self and offspring, would have been greater for women than men, favoring social response to female threat. Research shows women more likely to seek their own during stress, than men.



  The need for affiliation describes the need to feel a sense of involvement and belonging within a social group. David McClelland coined the term, extending Henry Murray's work finding human need and motivational processes. Murray set the taxonomy of needs, achievement, power and affiliation. Those with a high need for affiliation require warm interpersonal relationships and approval from regular contact. High need for affiliation support team members, but less effective in leadership.



  Fear leads people to congregate, triggering a need for affiliation. Schacter found anxious fear increases the need to affiliate with others who have gone through the same situation or others who could help them. The strength of this need varies among different people, sometimes people just want to be together.



  The need for affiliation can be increased or decreased. Yacov Rofe suggests the need for affiliation depends on whether other's input is necessary. Obviously, when another's opinion is valued, affiliation increases. Similarly, if involvement means being more embarrassed, affiliation decreases. Individual need for affiliation varies as people want an optimal balance of time to theirselves and time spent with others.



  Achievement motivated typically try to master tasks or situations. They prefer moderate amounts of difficulty, prefer work based on effort, and want feedback.



 High need for affiliation prefer spending time creating and maintaining relationships, being part of groups, desire feeling loved and accepted. Because they worry too much how others perceive them, they do not make good managers.



  The motivational need comes from the desire to teach, encourage or influence others. Here, people enjoy work and value discipline. The down side: group goals become zero-sum, in nature. For one to win, another must lose.



   McClelland proposes top management should have a high need for power and a low need for affiliation. The need for acheivement can make good managers, though not best suited for top management positions.





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